Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
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