There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
