you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
