thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
