I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
