My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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