Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize