Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
