Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I'm at about main and main street
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Damn victory sex feels great
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