It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
