i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Is it because I queefed?
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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