She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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