Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize