I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
