Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Your penis caused this!
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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