So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
