Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
