They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
