so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Go christen that room with your naked body.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Randomize
