god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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