what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
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