Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
