...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
