after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
