My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
