Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
