i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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