so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
