Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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