what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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