love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
