god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Randomize
