96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
