At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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