i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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