I am in a vortex of obligation.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Randomize
