if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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