You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize