the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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