the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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