Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
