I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
