And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
