i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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