I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
