I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
