It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
