Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
