The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
