im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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